Can we be single and happy?
"My existence alone, I live it fully. I want to redo my life, but not at any price, "says Christelle, 35, a single mother divorced for two years. "I take advantage of the variants of love: the tenderness that I find with my family and my daughter, the complicity I share with my friends ..." At a time when marriage is no longer a must, where the life of a couple thinks more in CDD than in CDI and where society is more individualistic, we are all led to know periods of celibacy. Gone are the days when the Catherinettes were mocked and the old boys ridiculed. Today, singles and some do not hesitate to extol the merits of solo life. Without making it a life project.
Singles flourished
Among the solos, they are numerous to prove that it is possible to exist and to blossom out of the life of couple, which is often far from being a quiet river. Preferring, at least for a time, celibacy. For Léa, 41, living alone is a choice. "I will not get married, I saw too many disasters around me. On the other hand, I do not say that I do not crack from time to time. Having a fellow traveler is nice, but not full time. Especially since women, who have become financially independent, now have this choice.
Exit the image of the unfortunate single and left behind. Place to that of a celibacy that can be a source of fulfillment. The key ? "To attend to one's self, to be more attentive to one's needs," says Dominique Contardo-Jacquelin, psychotherapist. To wonder about what would please me, about the people I could meet ... "And also, find other areas of self-realization that the couple: professional, artistic, associative, sports ... But singles can prove that to exist other than two is possible and enjoy a more positive image than before, they continue to disturb.
The couple remains the norm
Isabelle is 37 years old. She is now alone and childless. "During family gatherings, I generate indifference or embarrassment. At work, I wipe out all kinds of remarks. Previously, it made me jump. Now, I try to detach myself from this mirror that they project on me and which is in no way my reflection. Even today, we continue to expect a single person to one day find his half. If possible before reaching the age of thirty, a fateful decade for all those who are not yet "cased". As for the separated quads and fifties, it is up to them to quickly turn the page and find someone without delay. "The pressure is actually much more insidious, says Florence Maillochon, sociologist and researcher at INED. We are raised in a very free ideology, governed by the cult of individualism. There is no longer any obligation to form a traditional family. But the incentive to be in a couple remains very heavy. "
Media, advertising, dating sites ... Everywhere, it is the apology of the couple, which, in our so-called uninhibited society, remains the rule. It is a sign of socialization and, it must be admitted, a way to make life more comfortable: to face life and its hardships, to buy a house, to go on a trip, or simply to go to the It's better to be two. In a world where everything is designed for couples, "it's hard to be alone," adds Jean-Michel Hirt, psychoanalyst. Many people are convinced, and I believe, rightly, that the great adventure of a lifetime is a love story. That's the most exciting thing. "
Singles flourished
Among the solos, they are numerous to prove that it is possible to exist and to blossom out of the life of couple, which is often far from being a quiet river. Preferring, at least for a time, celibacy. For Léa, 41, living alone is a choice. "I will not get married, I saw too many disasters around me. On the other hand, I do not say that I do not crack from time to time. Having a fellow traveler is nice, but not full time. Especially since women, who have become financially independent, now have this choice.
Exit the image of the unfortunate single and left behind. Place to that of a celibacy that can be a source of fulfillment. The key ? "To attend to one's self, to be more attentive to one's needs," says Dominique Contardo-Jacquelin, psychotherapist. To wonder about what would please me, about the people I could meet ... "And also, find other areas of self-realization that the couple: professional, artistic, associative, sports ... But singles can prove that to exist other than two is possible and enjoy a more positive image than before, they continue to disturb.
The couple remains the norm
Isabelle is 37 years old. She is now alone and childless. "During family gatherings, I generate indifference or embarrassment. At work, I wipe out all kinds of remarks. Previously, it made me jump. Now, I try to detach myself from this mirror that they project on me and which is in no way my reflection. Even today, we continue to expect a single person to one day find his half. If possible before reaching the age of thirty, a fateful decade for all those who are not yet "cased". As for the separated quads and fifties, it is up to them to quickly turn the page and find someone without delay. "The pressure is actually much more insidious, says Florence Maillochon, sociologist and researcher at INED. We are raised in a very free ideology, governed by the cult of individualism. There is no longer any obligation to form a traditional family. But the incentive to be in a couple remains very heavy. "
Media, advertising, dating sites ... Everywhere, it is the apology of the couple, which, in our so-called uninhibited society, remains the rule. It is a sign of socialization and, it must be admitted, a way to make life more comfortable: to face life and its hardships, to buy a house, to go on a trip, or simply to go to the It's better to be two. In a world where everything is designed for couples, "it's hard to be alone," adds Jean-Michel Hirt, psychoanalyst. Many people are convinced, and I believe, rightly, that the great adventure of a lifetime is a love story. That's the most exciting thing. "
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